Don't Let Pie Become The Defining Moment Of Your Motherhood

My friend shared a picture on facebook. It was a pie with one piece missing and a quote from Tenneva Jordan, "A mother is a person who, seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie."

I've thought about this for a couple of days now, and I'm still bothered by it. Setting aside the fact that no one who knows me would ever believe I never cared for pie, I just can't find myself in this quote.

Here is a mother proving her motherhood by pretending to not like pie, so the other four people in the room can have it. Presumably these other four people would be her children, since it is a question of her motherhood, but maybe not. Maybe motherhood makes you self-sacrificing in the face of anyone in danger of missing out on a piece of pie? Otherwise, how would anyone know you are a mother?

Here's the thing I want to tell all the judgmental pie-counters.

A mother is a person who cuts the pie smaller so everyone gets a piece.

A mother is a person who waits to pull out the pie until the kids are in bed, and then shares it with her husband by candlelight.

A mother is a person who does't tell anyone else about the pie, and eats it all herself.

A mother is a person who makes a run to the store to buy another pie when the first one runs short.

You see, motherhood has very little to do with your response to pie. It is a poor reflection of motherhood, this definition based not on what you give, but on what you give up. This quote is nothing more than judgement cloaked as inspiration. It is not really an affirmation of you in any way.

Pie is certainly not the most important thing in life. But in this quote, I see more than pie. I see a diminishing. A woman disappearing.

Although you may find yourself making sacrifices for your children, as most parents do, becoming a mother does not mean you are doomed to a pie-less life. Sacrifices can come from a place of love and be beautiful things, but it is the entirety of your love that your children desire and will remember, not your moments of unnecessary sacrifices.

Don't allow yourself to become less, to give yourself less, to ask for less, to demand less, because you are a mother. Your needs, and even your wants, are still valid. Your response to a pie shortage does not define you as a woman or a mother.

Do you agree? Tell me how this quote makes you feel.
Or just tell me about your favorite kind of pie. 

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